REBUKING THE SINS OF FAMILY AND CLOSE FRIENDS

If you are a Christian teacher of the Bible who labors to follow Jesus’ example and His New Testament’s instructions in your life and teaching of God’s Word, it is important to understand and prepare yourself for those family members who, whether related to you by blood or law, think they are exempt from being taught Biblical truths that expose and refute their sins and/or spiritual weaknesses. To some of them being related to you means that you do not teach the Bible to them as you do to those unrelated to you. The foregoing is the case with those family members outside of Christ as well as those in Christ who are guilty of sin.

The foregoing is also true for some who are your close friends. Their understanding of being close friends means that they are exempt from your rebukes for any sins they have committed. Although in their thoughts or words they have never explicitly (in just so many words) said as much, they assume you have the same view of what it means to be their close friend as they do to be yours―close friends do not deal with each other’s sins as they do with other people’s sins. They expect preferential treatment. It is best described as the sinful “respecter of persons” mentality. When one must deal with the sins and/or spiritual weaknesses of family members and/or close friends in seeking to bring them to repentance, it will not take long to see which of them will thank you for loving them enough to say things to them that they need to hear, which things are painful for them to hear as well as for you to say.

It must have been a painful thing for the apostles Paul and Peter, along with their brethren, when Paul’s love for Jesus, His truth, His church, and Peter’s soul to withstand his fellow apostle, Peter, “to the face” because of the latter’s sin of hypocrisy (Galatians 2:11, 13). But not only had Peter sinned himself, but his sinful conduct caused other brethren to follow in his hypocritical footsteps. Paul’s public rebuke of Peter must have been at the very least a great embarrassment to Peter. However, on more than one occasion during our Lord’s personal ministry Jesus had rebuked Peter, and sometimes sharply, for his sins and spiritual weakness (Matthew 16:33; 13:31; Mark 14:29, 30). But to Peter’s great credit we see how humble, teachable, and correctable the apostle was (Proverbs 9:8; 13:1; 27:6; Ecclesiastes 7:5).

The episode of Paul rebuking Peter because of the latter’s sin did not result in the two apostles being estranged from one another as many times it is the case. There is no indication in the sacred writings that Peter was upset and angry with Paul because the latter publicly rebuked him for his sin. Peter did not cease to speak to or avoid Paul because the former was rebuked by the apostle to the Gentiles. In fact, many years later Peter referred to Paul “as our beloved brother” (II Peter 3:15). All too often when some brethren are publicly or privately rebuked for their sins, especially if the rebuke comes from brethren in the Lord who are family members or close friends, those receiving the rebuke forever hold a grudge against the one who delivered the rebuke.

Peter bore the marks of Christian character traits that all too few exercise when their sins are exposed by one who loves them enough to rebuke them for their sins. However, we who would be faithful in all things must be willing to lose the closeness that exists between family members as well as the closeness of our best friends in demonstrating our love for God, His Word, the church, and the sinner in need of rebuking. All too often those family members and close friends turn out to be only “fair weather friends” and “sunshine patriots.” They are simply not all they would have you to believe they are when it comes to their Christianity.

On the other hand, we who may be on the receiving end of a justified rebuke ought to look to Peter for an example of how to receive a deserved rebuke in being willing to cast down whatever pride we may have hindering us from making whatever corrections we need to make in order to be faithful to God. Moreover, we should be thankful for the child of God who loved us enough to point out our spiritual weaknesses and sins. Surely, if we understand that we have an obligation to God to rebuke the sins of our brethren, then we should also understand that we are to welcome being shown our sins by someone else, especially when we are rebuked by family members and friends, close or otherwise.

In closing this brief message we must realize that none of us who rightfully wear the name of Christ ought to allow pride, emotions, or relationships to cause us to fail in what needs to be said to or done with people in our efforts to get them to repent of their sins. The unforgiven sins in our lives are the only things that can separate us from God. Thus, those sins must be dealt with according to the scriptures. In order to do that, sinners must know and come to grips with the fact that certain actions in their lives are sinful and if heaven is to be their home they must repent of those sinful actions. Of course, if they do not repent, then at their death, or if the Lord returns first, they will be sentenced to eternal torment in a devils hell. No one wants that to happen to anyone―especially one’s dearly beloved family members and close friends. And to them and all others with Paul we ask, “Am I become your enemy, because I tell you the truth” (Galatians.4:16).

David P. Brown

The Never Failing Scriptures

The Claims of the Scriptures

The writers either told the truth or else they did not. If they did not tell the truth about this [i.e. that they were writing by inspiration], then how can we put any confidence in anything else they said? Why should they desire to misrepresent the truth? If they did misrepresent the truth in their claims to inspiration, then they condemned themselves most severely. The apostle Peter’s second letter was written for the sole purpose of rebuking false prophets and deceivers. One could hardly find anything that even resembles it outside of Holy Writ. The apostle Paul often Warned his reader to “lie not one to another.” In the first chapter of Romans, he listed deceit as one of the deadly sins committed by the Gentiles, which caused God to “give them up unto a reprobate mind.” The beloved John Was very outspoken against those who misrepresent the truth. He tells how Jesus rebuked some of the Jews in strong language, thus: “Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father it is your will to do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and standeth not in the Way of truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father thereof” (John 8:44). In Rev. 21:8 John writes: “But the fearful, and unbelieving, and abominable, and murderers, and idolaters, and all liars. their part shall be in the lake that burneth with fire and brimstone; which is the second death.” It is inconceivable that these men could write such bitter denunciations against all who misrepresent the truth when they themselves made false claims about the revelation which they gave to us.

L.R. Wilson

Life Line Printing and Book Co. 1948. Pages 11-12

Forgiveness - Without Repentance?

Children of God should love all men, even their enemies, and when they repent, forgive them. Occasionally, I am asked if it is our duty to forgive those who sin against us when they neither ask for nor desire forgiveness. It is not only not our duty to do so, were we so disposed, but it is an utter impossibility.

The question recurs because many people persist in disregarding what the Scriptures teach is involved in genuine repentance and by substituting their concept of what they feel forgiveness should include. Those who do this imply, whether they intend to or not, that forgiveness is simply the cancellation of all bitter, revengeful, and uncharitable feelings toward those who sin against us, and the substitution of a disposition of kindness, love, and warm regard for the offending one or ones—a disposition, they urge, which should always be characteristic of faithful Christians.

But many devoted and dedicated disciples of the Lord never experience bitter, revengeful, and uncharitable feelings toward those who sin against them, however cruel and heartless such actions may have been. This attitude of a kind disposition is not forgiveness, anyway. God never entertains “bitter, revengeful, and uncharitable” feelings toward even the most vile of sinners, but He forgives only those who repent.

Our Lord, in the shadows of Gethsemane, prayed for those who hated Him so much they sought and obtained His execution, but He did not forgive them until they repented. Amid the agonies of the cross, He said to His Father, “forgive them; for they know not what they do” (Luke 23:34), a petition not unconditional in nature, since by His own words first uttered in the Great Commission (Mark 16:15-16) and later applied by Peter it was intent that pardon be bestowed only on the basis of repentance and obedience to the commandments He gave (Acts 2:36-38).

The words remission and forgiveness often translate to the same Greek word aphesis, the meaning of which is “release,” and “sending of sins away” and the consequent restoration of the peaceful, cordial, and friendly relationship formerly existing. Unless the offender wants this “peaceful, cordial, friendly” relationship, it is impossible for the offended to affect it, however much he may desire and seek it.

It is this point people often say, “Yes, but we must be ready to forgive always,” as indeed we ought, but it should be recognized that such readiness is not forgiveness. Our Lord made crystal clear our obligation in all such cases when He said, “Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him. And if he trespass against thee seven times … turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him” (Luke 17:3-4). Thus, the divine edict is, if one sins against us, we are to rebuke him; and when he repents, we are to forgive him.

It is the duty of all children of God to love all men, even their enemies, actively to seek their good, and pray for their well-being; and, when they repent, to forgive them. It should ever be borne in mind that reconciliation is an integral and essential element of the relationship resulting from penitence on the part of the offender and forgiveness on the offended, and that is occasioned by an adjustment and settlement of all differences that led to the alienation. We must be sure that no action or attitude of ours deters the proper response of others to us because our fellowship here on Earth and our salvation in Heaven are matters intimately involved.

Guy N. Woods